Sometimes I feel disappointed in myself.
When things aren’t working out the way I want them to, it can be tempting to look back and tell myself – well, if I hadn’t done that thing days, months or even years ago – I would not be in this mess or I would be over there by now.
And, you know, that could be true but the very act of looking back and blaming myself for actions taken or not taken is really not helpful. It just leaves me in a loop of beating up on myself for something which I can’t change. It puts me in a space where I can’t see anything clearly, a space where I drown out any inspiration with the loud internal noise of different shades of ‘I’m not good enough’.
Then I feel uncomfortable, irritated, maybe even desperate. And therein lies the clue to what’s going on – those uncomfortable, painful feelings are not telling me that I’m not ‘good enough’ or that I’ve done something ‘wrong’, they are reminding me of what I have forgotten in that moment – that we are all innately whole, appreciated and loved.
So when we sometimes wonder ‘What was I thinking when I did that?’, it’s because our perspective has changed – maybe we have different information or maybe we are simply seeing things more clearly.
We can only act from the place of what makes sense to us in the moment. And there is an innocence in that. Each one of us is acting according to the way we are seeing the world in the moment – clearly through the lens of Love or somehow distorted because, momentarily, we have forgotten who we are.
Are you doing the best you can? Yes, always.
Give yourself a break.